So I'll be honest. The thought to drop the race has come across my mind a lot today.

I found out I can't put my student loans in deferment while I'm gone for the race. This means raising a significant amount more in addition to my $18K needed to go on the race, as well as personal spending money.

If I'm being honest, I can't see how this is going to work. I've felt sick since I found out.

I've never been more sure of any decision I've ever made, or that God has truly called me to do the Race, but right now, that's really hard to see. I'm essentially now trying to raise/save $26K. That's a lot of money.

In addition to these, I also have to get all of my vaccines still, which total about $600-700.

In my head, I know that's a lot of money. And in my head, I know that God is a big God, and that He provides in crazy ways when he calls a person to something.

But if I'm being honest, my heart is currently pretty full of doubting, lacking faith, and just feeling defeated.

All of that being said, I'm not ready to quit. I'm not ready to throw in the towel. I will fight for this. I will fight for this calling that God has put in this chapter of my life, and I will do everything I can in fundraising.

If you feel called to give and partner with me financially, please feel free to click the "donate now" button. If you want to give specifically toward my loans or vaccines, I have both Venmo (VicksMix) and the Cash app (vicksmix).

The Race is already one of the most humbling experiences that God has ever called me to. But the biggest thing I am learning right now is this:

I can't do this alone.